I was going to title this “You Know You’re Kurdish if…” but I realized how much is general pan-Middle Easternness. Oh dear, don’t tell any of us that we are alike in any way. Actually some of this extends to my South and East Asian cousins, which brings me to number one….

 

You know you’re Middle Eastern if:

  • You keep meeting more and more cousins, that you didn’t know you existed. In addition to the 50+ you do know.
  • There may be seats for a crowd but you find yourself parked more often than not on one of the many rugs on the floor.
  • You think drinking coffee or tea at 11pm perfectly normal and the perfect hot drink before bed.
  • There is dried fruit and various sweets ferreted away ALL over the house.
  • You were taught perfume and cologne are best applied liberally…aka half the bottle to go get groceries.
  • You always do what your aunties tell you to do, even when you are 50.
  • You know that yogurt is at its best plain, sour and thick…and makes an excellent summertime drink.
  • You never have enough scarves.
  • You know family get-togethers always run waay past midnight.
  • Most of the men in your family have impressive facial hair.
  • You ALWAYS take off your shoes as soon as you get inside anyone’s house.
  • You frequently find rice and dried currents stuck to the bottom of your socks.
  • The scent of rice and tea automatically make you feel more relaxed.
  • Impressive CD and cassette collections have frequented your entire life.
  • Your grandma thinks pet animals inside the house are strange and unnatural.
  • You know to start drinking your tea within 1-2 mins of having it poured and the burn feels good.
  • You automatically always leave a bit of tea in the bottom of your cup.
  • Hummous is your jam.
  • Trays of all sizes are necessary house items. You never know how many cups of tea you will have to carry!
  • Eyeliner application skills are acquired at birth.

Obviously there are many more, but then I would have to start a whole new blog to catalogue them all. Also this is a humorous list of generalizations that are not in any way completely true of the wonderful various persons and cultures in or from the Middle East.

Basically, visiting my relatives is like nestling back into my roots. SO MUCH TEA. I AM IN HEAVEN.

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